The Golden Girls went off the air decades ago. In fact, this month was the 34th anniversary of the show’s premiere on NBC. But it still serves up some hilarious one-liners and laughs that get us to this day. In fact, you can keep yourself going watching reruns of all seven seasons on Hulu whenever you want. You can also join the Golden Girls themed cruise leaving the shores of Florida next year.
Against all odds, this older cast proved that age doesn’t matter when you’re hilarious. Starring an ensemble cast of Estelle Getty (as Sophia), Betty White (as Rose), Rue McClanahan (as Blanche), and Bea Arthur (as Dorothy), people of all ages loved watching these older ladies living together and going through the ups and downs of dating. So, cut yourself a slice of cheesecake, sit back, and let these quotes fill you with laughs.
“I’VE BEEN HAVING A GOOD TIME, AND THERE WASN’T EVEN A MAN IN THE ROOM.”
Of course, Blanche is known for her preference in male company. She often has gentlemen callers arrive at the house and has the most active dating life out of any of her roommates. But, as she admits through this quote, even she doesn’t need a man to have a good time. Sometimes you just need your friends.
“YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY: YOU CAN LEAD A HERRING TO WATER, BUT YOU HAVE TO WALK REALLY FAST OR HE’LL DIE.”
Rose is known for her extremely simple and naive advice. Sometimes you have to laugh at her because you have no idea what she’s thinking or how this even makes sense. Take this particular Rose quote. No one knows why she said it, or what the point was. But that’s what’s so funny about it.
“BETTER LATE THAN…” “PREGNANT!”
Blanche always knows what to say to make things awkward. This particular moment came when all of the girls were on a game show, with Blanche and Dorothy against Sophia and Rose. Blanche and Dorothy had to finish the sentence, which usually goes “better late than never.” Blanche just misunderstood the context.
“I THINK THERE’S A CONNECTION BETWEEN YOUR BRAIN AND WALLPAPER PASTE.”
Poor Rose always finds herself the butt of the joke about her brains. This particular quote was spoken by Sophia after Rose made one of her signature comments. Rose was telling a story about her old local jeweler, and to her, the fact that he was Jewish meant there was some kind of connection. To Sophia, this connection was lost in Rose’s brain.
“WHY DON’T I JUST WEAR A SIGN THAT SAYS ‘TOO UGLY TO LIVE’?”
Poor Dorothy uttered this quote in a moment of sheer frustration. Who hasn’t gone through this train of thought at one point or another trying to get dressed for a date? When no outfit works and you just want to give up? The way that Sophia was always teasing Dorothy about her appearance, it’s no wonder she felt this way sometimes.
“JEAN IS A NICE PERSON. SHE HAPPENS TO LIKE GIRLS INSTEAD OF GUYS. SOME PEOPLE LIKE CATS INSTEAD OF DOGS. FRANKLY, I’D RATHER LIVE WITH A LESBIAN THAN A CAT. UNLESS A LESBIAN SHEDS; THAT I DON’T LIKE.”
Sophia is just out here telling it like it is. People are people, no matter who they love. To those of us watching the show now, it’s hard to believe that people still needed an explanation about this. That’s probably why it’s so funny now. At the time, this was a pretty progressive opinion, especially coming from someone as old school as Sophia. But it is absolutely true.
“DOROTHY, WAS SOPHIA NAKED JUST NOW OR DOES HER DRESS REALLY NEED IRONING?”
This quote was another great bout of naive comedy from Rose. Hey, it’s an honest question. The best one-liners come from Rose because half the time she never realized she was actually insulting anyone. She was just saying how she felt about things. You have to love that about her.
“ISN’T IT AMAZING HOW I CAN FEEL SO BAD, AND STILL LOOK SO GOOD?”
Another great Blanche quote, this one tell us how we should all be feeling. Everyone should have the confidence Blanche has. Sure, looks aren’t everything. But feeling amazing and beautiful can make a world of difference. No one can ever convince her otherwise, and that’s what matters.
“NO! NO, I WILL NOT HAVE A NICE DAY.”
Have you ever been so mad you just couldn’t stand people saying anything to you, even if it’s something nice? Dorothy has. There’s a reason that people always recommend the “kill them with kindness” method. It’s because it works. You’ve probably tried this if you’ve ever worked in retail or customer service. Dorothy showed us all what those other people felt like all along.
“FORGIVE ME, ROSE, BUT I HAVEN’T HAD SEX IN 15 YEARS AND IT’S STARTING TO GET ON MY NERVES.”
Poor Sophia always had to sit around and listen to the girls, mostly Blanche, tell stories about their dates and romantic adventures without having any of her own. No one ever really realized that Sophia didn’t have these stories to tell. There’s a little something about perspective here.
